In the words of Casey, “Resentment is a prism.”
It can distort your perception, overshadowing the good in your life and relationship, while magnifying pain. Resentment is a powerful emotion that can significantly impact a marriage, leading to feelings of disempowerment, blindness to positive aspects of the relationship, and an overwhelming sense of injustice.
The Root Causes of Resentment
Resentment in marriage often stems from three key factors:
- Boundary Violations: Whether spoken or unspoken, intentional or unintentional, when boundaries are crossed, it can lead to feelings of anger and frustration. For example, if one partner repeatedly dismisses the other’s opinions, it can create a sense of disrespect and devaluation, which breeds resentment.
- Feelings of Helplessness: When a partner feels powerless to prevent or address a painful situation, resentment can take root. This helplessness might manifest as thoughts like, “How could I have let this happen?” or…
